Sunday Sharies 03.06.22

A QUOTE

“The first principle is that you must not fool yourself, and you are the easiest person to fool.”
— Richard Feynman, American physicist


A QUESTION

If I weren't so sure I was right, what else might I learn?


A THOUGHT

Our attitude depends on the stories we tell ourselves. So long as we believe something that comforts us, it’s easy to exonerate ourselves from an alternate reality that might unsettle us. It's human nature to frame our circumstances in a way that either excuses or empowers our stance.

But the stories we tell ourselves about another's intentions are often wrought with our own biases and flowery detail.

We're guilty of filling in information:
"The difficult guy at work keeps “forgetting” to update me on the project because he wants to keep me under his thumb" versus "This is the second time I've been left off the invite. I wonder what's on his plate right now, he might be juggling a lot this month."

The first statement starts with a feeling, the second starts with a fact. And while the latter may not provide a perfect explanation, it begins with a truth and opens the mind to possible alternatives.

When you think through the facts and then lead with them, you can invite others to do the same and bring new interpretations to a pool of shared meaning:

• "How do you see it?"

• "What's your perspective?"

• "Can you help me understand?"

By starting with facts, we reduce the fiction.